This has been a beautiful and hard journey. I had my doubts about whether or not being an artist was the correct path for me at times. That emotion is undoubtedly familiar to quite a few people. When you pursue your passion, you may begin to question your sanity a little.
I remember when people would ask me what I was in college for and I'd reply "I'm an art student," and they'd stare at me with a pitiful expression, so I'd quickly follow up with "I'm going to be one of those 3D artists, you know, from Pixar," and they'd instantly relax.
But I didn't.
Whenever someone's reaction was not enthusiastic or happy about what I wanted to do with my life, I felt a deep feeling of unease and shame. But that's no way to live and in the long run, that wasn't satisfying. What I needed to remember was that everyone has their own life journey, and mine just happened to be outside of the norm.
And that’s fine.
My desire to impress random strangers had taken priority over my enjoyment of creating. And that's not how a creator should feel or even work. Creators, Artists, and Innovators are meant to feel a sense of joy and overpowering love for their creative medium. Once I came to grips with that, there was no more room in my heart for humiliation or shame. Instead, I was overpowered with this intense need to create beautiful works of art that amazed me and took my breathe away.
Truly, I've never felt more at ease with myself and what I'm supposed to be doing in this lifetime.